Cutting Room for December 7

  • Who knew Tom Cruise and Batman were tight? The miniature scientologist is going to get a huge box office bounce from a bat, as Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol will be preceded by a six-minute prologue for The Dark Knight Rises. But there’s a catch. No, you don’t have to swear allegiance to Xenu, but you do have to see it in “true” IMAX. Thankfully, AMC Oakview 24 (amctheaters.com) has a screen that made the cut. Which is great news for a legion of folks out there, as seeing this footage is literally the second most anticipated moment of their technically adult lives.
  • I make no apologies for my unabashed love of Starship Troopers, the only reason God gave us Casper Van Dien. But it is with a mixed heart that I announce to you that Neil Moritz, producer of all 57 Fast and Furious movies, has commissioned work to begin on a remake. Capturing the weird blend of fascist parody, B-movie violence and Denise Richard’s heaving bosom was catching lightning in a bottle the first time around. I breathlessly hope it can happen again.
  •  Because he’s too busy making multiple movies with Terrence Malick, Christian Bale will not play the title character in director Darren Aronfsky’s Noah. This news comes as a disappointment for all those who envisioned animals marching two-by-two directed by a guy who sounds like he has an angry head cold. Instead, Michael Fassbender may be hearing whispers from the lord, as the in-demand actor is reportedly being offered the part. Personally, I think a Fassbender is worth two bales, but that’s old testament math.

Cutting Room provides breaking local and national movie news … complete with added sarcasm. Send any relevant information to film@thereader.com. Check out Ryan on Movieha!, a weekly half-hour movie podcast (movieha.libsyn.com/rss), catch him on the radio on CD 105.9 (cd1059.com) on Fridays at around 7:30 a.m. and on KVNO 90.7 (KVNO.org) at 8:30 a.m. on Fridays and follow him on Twitter (twitter.com/thereaderfilm).


entered on 12/07/11 at 11:34 AM | read comments »


Cutting Room for November 30

  • Aksarben Cinema (aksarbencinema.com) must want to join Dundee Theatre (dundeetheatre.com) on the nice list this year, as the theater has also added Santa’s Cool Holiday Festival to their lineup for Dec 15-18. Chock full of quirky goodness, including the hallucinatory holiday cookie that is Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, this exciting blend of merriment and puzzlement is sure to become an annual ritual more fun than hanging stockings and less fun than chugging near-expired eggnog.
  • Actions speak louder than words, but numbers speak louder than verbs. So here’s some eye-popping stats provided by a recent study published by USC’s Annenberg School for Communication and Journalism. Women bought more than 50% of domestic movie tickets in 2009, but represented only 32.8% of speaking roles in those movies. Yipes. Even worse, women made up only 21.6% of producers, 13.5% of writers and an astounding 3.9% of the directors. The study is jam-packed full of depressing info like that, all of which begs the question: when will Hollywood knock it the hell off?
  • Technically, this is more TV news than movie news, but I’m invoking an executive order that gives me jurisdiction over all Muppet-related information. The Jim Henson Company has just sold NBC a new human/puppet show called “The New Nabors.” It’s a single-camera comedy about a human family who gets puppet neighbors. This in no way takes the sting and shame away from NBC’s decision to bench the best show on television, “Community,” at midseason, but it is a nice first attempt an apology. Now, put these shows on back-to-back, and all is forgiven.

Cutting Room provides breaking local and national movie news … complete with added sarcasm. Send any relevant information to film@thereader.com. Check out Ryan on Movieha!, a weekly half-hour movie podcast (movieha.libsyn.com/rss), catch him on the radio on CD 105.9 (cd1059.com) on Fridays at around 7:30 a.m. and on KVNO 90.7 (KVNO.org) at 8:30 a.m. on Fridays and follow him on Twitter (twitter.com/thereaderfilm).


entered on 11/30/11 at 06:11 AM | read comments »


Cutting Room for November 23

  • As someone who still giggles at the arc of Ice Cube’s career, you’ll find me chortling in the corner over this news: he’s gonna write and star in another Friday movie, possibly with Chris Tucker coming back. Tucker hasn’t made a non-Rush Hour movie since the Clinton administration, while Cube has been busy switching from “keeping it real” to “keeping it real…obvious how much I love Coors Light!” Who knows if they’ll recapture the magic of the original, but they will capture some cash.
  • Amy Adams must have really loved her work in The Muppets. Why else would she agree to star in another film with an oddly assembled character with ridiculous eyebrows, saggy facial features and a strangely gruff voice? That’s right, Adams will appear with Clint Eastwood in, Trouble with the Curve, about a baseball scout going on one last trip with his daughter. Eastwood said he was done acting after Gran Torino. Then again, he also says he likes Herman Cain for president, so I suppose we have to consider the source.
  • After much deliberation, the Hollywood Foreign Press Association has made what I believe to be their first correct decision: They’re bringing Ricky Gervais back to host the Golden Globes. Despite having savaged such legendary icons as Tim Allen, Gervais has been given another chance to make an awards show actually entertaining. In related news, Billy Crystal is hard at work penning a Monica Lewinsky joke for the Oscars.
  • After nearly five decades, the world is finally getting a big-screen Dr. Who movie. Set to be directed by David Yates, this is news that sure to leave die-hard fans of the phonebooth enthusiast and people who have never heard of the character saying “Who!” or “Who?”

Cutting Room provides breaking local and national movie news … complete with added sarcasm. Send any relevant information to film@thereader.com. Check out Ryan on Movieha!, a weekly half-hour movie podcast (movieha.libsyn.com/rss), catch him on the radio on CD 105.9 (cd1059.com) on Fridays at around 7:30 a.m. and on KVNO 90.7 (KVNO.org) at 8:30 a.m. on Fridays and follow him on Twitter (twitter.com/thereaderfilm).


entered on 11/23/11 at 11:21 AM | read comments »


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The Skeleton Twins

A dramedy about suicide elevated by its stars.

GRADE
B


Frank

A band that has a lead singer with a fake head will win your heart.

GRADE
A-


The Trip to Italy

Another affable outing with two British comedians.

GRADE
B+


Sin City: A Dame to Kill For

Still a fun place to visit, provided you're not a woman.

GRADE
C


The Giver

This adaptation of Lois Lowry's beloved award-winning classic will be none of those things.

GRADE
D


Boyhood

The only coming-of-age story anyone ever needs to make. 

GRADE
A+


Guardians of the Galaxy

A gleeful space opera that is as visually stunning as it is hilarious.

GRADE
A


Fall? Oh, me!

I’ve reviewed movies professionally for more than a dozen years. The few weeks immediately surrounding the end of summer has...

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Bro-man Holiday

First things first: The Trip to Italy, the sequel to 2010’s surprise hit The Trip, may be the whitest movie ever made....

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Bleak and White

Celebrated narcissist and Freddy Krueger look-a-like Frank Miller gives the women he writes a plethora of career choices....

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Take It Back

Fail gloriously, if you must fail. Go down swinging for the fences, punchdrunk and confident you’re making something truly...

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