If we don’t get Natalie Portman being chased by weirdly phallic, double-jawed acid spewers, looks like our consolation prize may not be too shabby.

God I wish the rest of life worked like that. I’m not sure the exchange rate on such things, but trading a Portman for a Hathaway (if it comes to that) seems beyond reasonable to me. It just occurred to me I never mentioned officially that this is for the Alien prequel for which Damon Lindelof apparently wrote a treatment that’s beyond awesome. James Franco is also circling the project, presumably as the alien. I’m kidding, I like J-Frank, he’s got personality, is willing to spoof himself on “30 Rock,” and may just be the actual meltdown that Joaquin Phoenix faked waiting to happen. Portman hasn’t passed yet, and Noomi Rapace (that’s a real name, I swear) and Casey Mulligan are also swimming in the waters around. The point is, I really thought this project was hot bread (toast) but it looks like Lindelof has taken something that was dead and made it appear alive…there’s a joke there, if someone who is a fan of “Lost” could help me with that…

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