• Who knew Tom Cruise and Batman were tight? The miniature scientologist is going to get a huge box office bounce from a bat, as Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol will be preceded by a six-minute prologue for The Dark Knight Rises. But there’s a catch. No, you don’t have to swear allegiance to Xenu, but you do have to see it in “true” IMAX. Thankfully, AMC Oakview 24 (amctheaters.com) has a screen that made the cut. Which is great news for a legion of folks out there, as seeing this footage is literally the second most anticipated moment of their technically adult lives.
  • I make no apologies for my unabashed love of Starship Troopers, the only reason God gave us Casper Van Dien. But it is with a mixed heart that I announce to you that Neil Moritz, producer of all 57 Fast and Furious movies, has commissioned work to begin on a remake. Capturing the weird blend of fascist parody, B-movie violence and Denise Richard’s heaving bosom was catching lightning in a bottle the first time around. I breathlessly hope it can happen again.
  •  Because he’s too busy making multiple movies with Terrence Malick, Christian Bale will not play the title character in director Darren Aronfsky’s Noah. This news comes as a disappointment for all those who envisioned animals marching two-by-two directed by a guy who sounds like he has an angry head cold. Instead, Michael Fassbender may be hearing whispers from the lord, as the in-demand actor is reportedly being offered the part. Personally, I think a Fassbender is worth two bales, but that’s old testament math.

Cutting Room provides breaking local and national movie news … complete with added sarcasm. Send any relevant information to film@thereader.com. Check out Ryan on Movieha!, a weekly half-hour movie podcast (movieha.libsyn.com/rss), catch him on the radio on CD 105.9 (cd1059.com) on Fridays at around 7:30 a.m. and on KVNO 90.7 (KVNO.org) at 8:30 a.m. on Fridays and follow him on Twitter (twitter.com/thereaderfilm).


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