- At some point, we’ve all asked ourselves “How do I follow up my debut, coming-of-age, feminist cannibal movie?” The only one of us who has an answer is Julia Ducournau, and she’s not telling. Ducournau’s Raw had an insanely unique spin on the tired “Hey, remember how much growing up sucked?” genre. Her new film, Titane, was just announced by Neon, and nobody knows what it’s about. I mean, Ducournau hopefully does. I would also assume somebody at Neon does, but honestly, if they saw Raw and just wanted to give her a blank check, that would also track. I am as excited to see this as I am mystified by what it could be about. Here’s hoping it’s a French remake of Titanic where Rose eats Jack at the end.
- As a fully certified evangelist for the church of Lori Petty’s Tank Girl, the best film to ever feature Ice-T as a violent kangaroo, I am over the moon right now. News recently broke that the cult classic, 1980s comic book series will be produced by (and hopefully star) Margot Robbie, who is so perfect for this role it detonates an explosive in my heart. If you’re totally unfamiliar with Tank Girl, you probably also don’t know what ‘zines are, and I’m sorry we killed the planet you will live on for longer than those of us who are familiar with Tank Girl.
- Modern cinema arguably peaked when John Woo swapped the faces of John Travolta and Nicholas Cage. Featuring one of the grossest lines about fruit ever uttered and Travolta doing a worse Nicholas Cage impression than Nicholas Cage usually does, Face/Off was so vital to our cultural wellness that they’re bringing it back. The big debate is about who will play the cop and criminal who get face swapped. Even money says they’ll just randomly pick two of the Chrises, but I hope they go really weird with it and put Ryan Gosling’s face on Idris Elba’s body or make Tilda Swinton wear Cate Blanchett’s skin on her skull. Wait, that last one is actually really good. Do that. Do that please!
- Finally, because we are not allowed to have a single good thing in this broken, awful, worst-possible timeline, Disney+ is scrapping plans for a new Muppet series. It would have been called Muppets Live Another Day and brought immense joy to people saddened by the miserable reality all around us. Instead, that title was overly ambitious, and the project is deader than bipartisanship. There’s still going to be an unscripted shortform series called Muppets Now, in which celebrities get interviewed, but if I wanted to watch a childlike puppet act like a goofy nutball around famous people, I’d just watch Fallon.
Cutting Room provides breaking local and national movie news … complete with added sarcasm. Send any relevant information to firstname.lastname@example.org. Check out Ryan on KVNO 90.7 on Wednesdays and follow him on Twitter @thereaderfilm.