Greetings to blog-thusiasts young and old, new and experienced, attractive and…oh who am I kidding, you’re all beautiful to me. This is how we wrap things up for the week: Every Friday I will make box office predictions consisting of the top 5 films (and a wildcard that may make it in). Then, on Monday, I rank myself using a formula that is way to boring for me to explain given how arbitrary these things are. Oh, and I do it all in haiku. This both separates me from the other predictors out there and makes it so that you have some high-class culture while you’re slumming on my site.

But before I do that, I usually start with some chit-chat about the weekend. Like, for example: This weekend the Chicago Bears can lock up a winning season. That’s part of what I will be thinking of this weekend…that and the speech team I coach that is. I hope that you have some wonderful seasonal plans ahead of you. Things like ice skating outside, sipping on hot wassail, spending every last dollar you have until you are destitute. You know, that sort of thing. Whatever you do, be safe, be happy, and we’ll see you back here on Monday, okay?

Now, on to some haikuing! Here’s how I see this week:

1.) Tangled – $26 million Who dethrones Potter? It’s CGI Rapunzel! That is a schocker.

2.) Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1 – $21 million Don’t cry for him, though. This is still a giant hit. Not the series’ best.

3.) Megamind – $6.5 million Forgot about this. It just keeps inching along. Like a centipede.

4.) Unstoppable – $6 million I don’t get this one. It’s a thrilling TRAIN movie? What year is it now?

5.) Burlesque – $5.5 million Cher AND Christina? That duo ain’t dynamic, it’s more pathetic.

Wildcard The Warrior’s Way – $5.5 million A ninja western? That is intriguing to me. But maybe JUST me.

Okay, that’s it for the week y’all. Have a good one, and don’t forget to follow me on Twitter!


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