Yes, this weekend does end with a whimper and not a bang. And that whimper isn’t just coming from me. It’s the wheeze that represents the death-breath of Saw , a franchise that just lived so far beyond the life it should have had that even 3D-ing it could only reanimate it’s corpse ever so slightly. Here’s hoping we’re done with that franchise…so everybody say hi to the second-place film, Paranormal Activity 2 , which has now made $65 million collectively on a $3 million budget. I’m sure we won’t be seeing one of THOSE every year now that Saw is leaving. May God have mercy on our box-office souls.
Here’s this weekend’s wrap-up, haiku style:
1.) Saw 3D – $24 million (Accuracy of prediction – 95.5%)
This is Saw 7
but they left that number out.
Maybe they can’t count?
2.) Paranormal Activity 2 – $16.5 million (Accuracy of prediction – 89%)
A tiny budget
and zero big-name actors
means big-ass profits.
3.) Red – $11 million (Accuracy of prediction – 81%)
This is holding great!
Mostly because it is fun.
And for old people.
4.) Jackass 3D – $8.5 million (Accuracy of prediction – 87%)
Poop jokes are ending.
Nut shots are moving along.
We’ll miss you, Jackass.
5.) Hereafter – $6.5 million (Accuracy of prediction – 88.5%)
It’s an Eastwood flop!
Can we hold him in check now?
His last few sucked ass.
Overall Accuracy of Prediction – 88%
Forgettable week.
That’s not good, life is too short.
Viva la MONDAY!!!????
Okay, that’s it, gang. Go be productive. I’m going to try not to hurl and count down the minutes before I get back in bed.