Greetings! I hope you had a wonderful weekend filled with shopping and much mirth and merriment. I borked my back shoveling, and the Chicago Bears lost to the New England Patriots 389 to -12. That score may not be accurate but it perfectly encapsulates the feeling of the game. Thus, let it be said that I face this Monday with all the positivity and energy of a roadkilled skunk. I have the Christmas spirit of Glenn Beck’s bizarro counterpart (wait, I may be that way normally). I have the work ethic of Yogi Bear (the cartoon layabout and not the CGI abomination coming to wreak havoc on your soul and drop excrement in your brain this holiday season). In short, I need a superhero to save this Monday.
By the might of Odin’s cankles! By the power of Odin’s empty eye socket sweat! I must say, that was a particularly fun little trailer, right?! I mean, I enjoyed myself with all the kicking and the punching, but then Natalie Portman ran in slow-motion and I was all “hellooooo NURSE!” She’s actually a nurse in the movie. That makes that joke really funny.
Thor was always going to be a tough sell. All the other Marvel movies have taken place clearly in the “real world.” You know, the “real world” where people make full suits of armor that fly and stuff. Bridging the gap between the “magic” and the “science” isn’t going to be totally as easy as having Thor say something like “in my world, they’re the same thing.” Oh, and your world is an ancient place where Gods dwell…there goes that science stuff you were just talking about. So here’s what Thor really has to do: be cool and fun. I know that some of the first stills from the movie got savaged by online bloggers…but those same online bloggers were mysteriously quite silent when those turd-a-licious Green Lantern images came out. I wonder if that had something to do with most of those same bloggers having been given a set visit to the latter and not the former. Hell, even when the trailer for The Green Lantern debuted to the pomp and circumstance of a pigeon fart, looking like something some lonely, abstinent-by-other-people’s-choice nerd put together in his basement, most bloggers said “just you wait, we saw the set and good things are coming.” I don’t care how many good things are coming for that Green Lantern movie: The suit looks awful, the supporting aliens look goofy, the tone seems all wrong, the acting is off, I could go on. Yet, somehow Thor was being poked fun at by folks?! Well, I hope this trailer restores the sanity. Everything looks right about this to me. From the over-the-top Hopkins yelling to the lightning-aided power slam at the end. It’s Thor . If you don’t like it, you don’t like Thor. And that’s cool, because not everybody likes everything. But just like the second Hulk movie was as close to the Hulk as anyone will ever get, this looks to be as close to Thor as a Thor movie will ever be.
So, quick recap: Thor looks fun. The Green Lantern looks like a fanboy hate crime. That’s all.
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