What Jesus complex? I’m just hanging out in my front room. Happy “Ishtar” to you all, followed by a/the happy April Fool! Everybody plays the fool sometimes. This year, surrender to your role and find the meaning in/to (y)our foolishness. Have fun with it! If it’s not fun — it’s not done. Peace and love to everyone. Happy spring! There are no mistakes.

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a ARIES (3.20-4.18)  Unexpectedly, they call. Your heart gallops as they stutter/explain that they don’t know why they called — perhaps it’s the mating call of the beautifully bewildered? Maybe a colleague wants you to unexpectedly jump to the other side? You hope and pray that it’s so… It’s happened before, and spring offers the perpetual proof it can happen again! Your next 6-year project starts up in 2 weeks. Gather, prepare, and then spend those seeds you sprouted a year ago. It’s happening all around you. Your main clue is/will be clothed in electric light-blue. Your 3rd eye will/should see the answer of what your 3rd ear hears.

b TAURUS (4.19-5.19)  Boys and girls (Venus conjunct Mars) running off together hand in hand, skipping school, breaking all the rules, smokin’ KOOLS and polishing each other’s jewels. When it’s all been said and done…why is the forbidden always more fun? You gotta thing with an Aries (Mars conjunct Venus in Aries) for another 2 weeks, and then you move on. It’ll be hot! And then, it’ll be not. Your past is/will be showing up in the weirdest places…

c GEMINI (5.20-6.19)  You’re still dreaming. What do you know that we don’t? How can you tell what we won’t? Watch the alcohol content. It could be bad for your reputation at work, and/or relating to your career (Mercury in Pisces in the 10th House). Bet the farm during these next 2 months — before Jupiter, the planet of luck, ships out by July.

d CANCER (6.20-7.21)  Just had the Fool Moon in Libra during last Wednesday, the 27th. It’s 2 weeks ’til the New Moon in Aries; the true astrological spring. Here comes the planet of luck, Jupiter, for a year-long residence in the sign of its exaltation, Cancer; your birthday gift from the cosmos. It’s a great year coming up for gardening of all types, travel, higher education, easy money, luck and romance.

e LEO (7.22-8.21)  Don’t appear as the April fool just ’cuz the calendar says it’s spring. Use these next 2 weeks to prepare to spring into your thing, starting at dawn on Wednesday, the 10th; the new Moon in Aries.

f VIRGO (8.22-9.21)  You’re dreaming of your partner. You’re at the beach, and everybody’s running ahead of you and laughing about how they’re going to pay for it all. Then…you come upon each other and the whole world disappears in each other’s eyes. You awaken as a beautiful girl hands you money (the Full Moon in your 2nd House of Libra).

g LIBRA (9.22-10.21)  Happy half-birthday! What/whom do you want to be in 6 Moons? You’re at a movie, watching other people fall in love. You’re kind of glad it’s not you, right? Love can turn so bad sometimes that it’s scary. Still, love means everything to you, doesn’t it? Times change. Wait for your momentum to grow — ’til you know that love is your/the way.

h SCORPIO (10.22-11.20)  Do your yoga — whatever that means to you. Plutonians: Regenerate or die to know why. Martians: Expect an unexpected, hot(!) love affair at work, the spa, or a sporting event…maybe something relating to a/your car?

i SAGITTARIUS (11.21-12.20)  Two more months to make your choice between the 2. Wha’cha gonna do — and who you gonna do it to?

j CAPRICORN (12.21-1.18)  Meditate on the method toward/of your regeneration ’til the 4th of July, while your ruler Saturn continues retrograde in early Scorpio. If you can wait ’til then, I’ll tell you why. Right now, you’re going over your sexual history one chapter at a time. Who you gonna call? It’s never too late for the truth. Ever wish you had told somebody you loved ’em, and then it was too late? Call ’em now. Tell ’em, “MOJO sent me.”

k AQUARIUS (1.19-2.17)  This is your time to spring into action. You’re dealing with a fiery Aries-type person that you either just met and/or started up with a year ago. Take care of the details and kick it into gear in 2 short weeks (on the 10th).

l PISCES (2.18-3.19)  Stay at home in your own zone, your bath, your shower, your fishbowl, your Shangri La, your hideout, your pad, or your pool — and just keep your boat afloat. Just stay at home and snooze after some booze and gruel…and for now, just let the April fool rule.


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